Wedding anniversary names come from the gift linked with each year. The best known are silver for the twenty-fifth anniversary, pearl for the thirtieth, ruby for the fortieth, golden for the fiftieth and diamond for the sixtieth. Silver and golden are the oldest, both from Germany. Most of the others were added in the 19th and 20th centuries, and a few, diamond among them, have moved.
Wedding anniversary names: the chart
| Anniversary | Name | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| 1st | Paper | Named in an American almanac of 1859 |
| 5th | Wooden | In the 1859 almanac and in Brewer's dictionary, 1895 |
| 10th | Tin | In the 1859 almanac and in Brewer, 1895 |
| 15th | Crystal | In Brewer, 1895 |
| 20th | China | In Brewer, 1895 |
| 25th | Silver | German custom, on record in the 18th century |
| 30th | Pearl | In a reference book of 1910 |
| 35th | Coral | Jade on the modern list |
| 40th | Ruby | |
| 45th | Sapphire | |
| 50th | Golden | German custom, on record in the 18th century |
| 55th | Emerald | |
| 60th | Diamond | Seventy-five years in some older American sources |
| 70th | Platinum | The name used by the Royal Household |
The years in between have gifts too, such as cotton, leather and steel, but they are rarely used as names. Nobody speaks of a "steel wedding" the way they speak of a silver one. For every year's gift, use the tool.
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Which anniversary is silver, and which is golden?
Silver is twenty-five years and golden is fifty. They are the original pair, and everything else on the list was built around them.
According to TIME, the solid evidence starts in 18th-century Germany, where friends might give a wife a silver wreath for the silberne Hochzeit and a gold one after fifty years. Ancient Roman or medieval origins are often claimed, but the magazine found actual instances hard to come by.
The names took time to cross into English. In 1811 a London magazine thought its readers would hardly comprehend a "silver wedding." By 1895 a standard British reference book, Brewer's Dictionary of Phrase and Fable, defined it without fuss as "the twenty-fifth anniversary, when, in Germany, the woman has a silver wreath presented her," adding that "on the fiftieth anniversary, or Golden Wedding, the wreath is of gold."
Where do the other names come from?
From the presents. Brewer explained that the wooden, tin, crystal, china, silver, golden and diamond weddings are named "from the nature of the gifts suitable for each respective anniversary."
The humbler names were in use in America by the mid-19th century. TIME cites an almanac of 1859 that listed a paper wedding at one year, a wooden one at five and a tin one at ten, and even a sugar wedding one month after the ceremony. Some old sources also mention a copper wedding at twelve and a half years, halfway to silver.
When Emily Post set out the anniversaries in Etiquette in 1922, she gave eight: paper, wood, tin, crystal, china, silver, gold and diamond. That short list is the backbone of every later one.
The jewel names in between came later. A reference book of 1910 already gave pearl, coral, emerald and ruby for the anniversaries from the thirtieth to the forty-fifth. Their order has since been rearranged: today ruby is fixed at forty, sapphire at forty-five and emerald at fifty-five.
Is the diamond anniversary 60 or 75 years?
Both have been used, and the sources split in an interesting way.
- Seventy-five years: the American almanac of 1859 and Emily Post in 1922.
- Sixty years: an American dictionary of the 1880s, according to TIME, and Brewer in Britain in 1895.
Today sixty years is the usual answer on both sides of the Atlantic. Debrett's, the British etiquette publisher, connects the sixty-year diamond with Queen Victoria's Diamond Jubilee, which celebrated sixty years on the throne. Many charts keep diamond at seventy-five as well, so the name can be used twice.
Which anniversaries are officially recognized?
In the United Kingdom the King sends a message of congratulations for a sixtieth, sixty-fifth or seventieth wedding anniversary, and for every anniversary after that. According to the Royal Household, the message is not automatic and has to be applied for. The same page uses the names "diamond wedding" for the sixtieth and "platinum" for the seventieth.
Nothing is sent for the silver, ruby or golden anniversaries. Those are family occasions.
Are British and American names different?
The names of the milestone years are the same in both countries: silver, pearl, ruby, golden, diamond. The differences are in usage and in the minor years.
- "Ruby wedding" and "golden wedding" are everyday phrases in Britain. Americans more often say "fortieth anniversary" and "golden anniversary."
- The sixth year is sugar in Britain and iron in the United States.
- The first two years are paper and cotton in the United States and at Debrett's; some older British lists reverse them.
The full comparison is in our chart of gifts for every anniversary year.
Do the names mean anything?
Each has a usual explanation: silver for a bond that has kept its shine, gold for one that does not tarnish, diamond for what cannot be broken. These readings are sentiment attached to the names afterward. The old sources are plainer. The names describe the gifts, and the gifts become more valuable as the years add up.
Jewelers also publish a stone for every year, including the early ones; see gemstones for each anniversary.