I’ve lived 32 years of life, and most would say, “you’re so young, how much tragedy could you possibly have faced?” The most common response I receive though is, “I would have never known you’ve gone through all of that just knowing who you are today.” Everyone has a path and journey in life, this just happens to be mine.
It dawned on me to write this one day as I was sitting and looking out the window and began reviewing all of what I had experienced. I thought about each lesson I had gained from each hardship. I have done this often in the past as I approach a new level of awareness or a new chapter in life. In many ways, it puts into perspective what I am facing currently. I find it healthy to remember how far I’ve come. For that matter, I think it is healthy for everyone to reflect on all they have been able to accomplish and what obstacles they’ve overcome.
This article is more of a note to you of all the loss and tragedy I’ve experienced and all the ways I’ve become stronger from it. It’s long and hard-hitting, so get comfortable or bookmark this page to come back to when you are ready. The overall message is of hope and how you too can turn whatever you’ve gone through into something that empowers you. My other purpose and wish is that this gives you a sense of comfort knowing you are not alone in what you’re facing. That many of us have experience the same things, and may just quietly be dealing with it. The greatest relief in my journey is meeting and conversing with other women who have survived what I had experience and went on to lived beautiful, healthy lives. I earnestly wish that is something I can give to you as well. So here we go, I will start from the beginning as I’ve heard it is the very good place to start. Here are the lessons learned from tragedy:
Hi my loves! I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday season. This is typically the point in time where we start dreaming about the new year that is a mere week away. As a kid, I would dread January. But as an adult, I’ve grown to love how much the month feels like a fresh start. Last night, I was thinking about the goals and dreams I have for 2019. The biggest point that stood out was, how important it is to invest in one’s self.
So what does that mean?
This is a really vulnerable article to write that I contemplated about sharing. Ultimately, at the end of the day, I kept hearing over and over again I need to share this. I need to share this because it could possibly helping another person who may really need to hear this as well. So here we go, even if it is a tad bit vulnerable for me, I am grateful I am given the chance to potentially help another person.
About three month ago, I went through one of the hardest times of my life. Not THE hardest, but dang close to it. I knew I needed something I could read ever single day all through the day that will build me up. I needed something that felt like a gigantic hug that I could give to myself each time I felt down. I wanted to teach myself how to pull myself back up by my bootstraps, and give myself the security and love I deserved.
I sat down one night and just wrote. The words came easily and flowed right onto my screen. I had no idea what I had written until it was all done. Definitely one of those higher power experiences. When I read back all that I had written, it touch on every single point that I needed healing.
Recently, I had gone through a rough patch emotionally and physically. Like, ya’ll we have a lot of catching up to do. But I’ll save it for another day and time, I am still learning how I can share it in away that can benefit another person or help others. I am also still very much learning and growing from all of it. I truly believe, that if you want healthy changes in your life, it begins with YOU. Or in this case, myself. And that any obstacle is meant to make you freaking fierce, stronger, and more beautiful.
I digress… anyway due to all the emotional stress, I physically started to feel off. I could barely move I was so tired. No joke, one day I did half my hair then fell back into bed to take a nap. When I “powered through” on those days I needed to show up and be in attendance, I felt this low grade nausea. On top of that, I started breaking out as if I had hit puberty again. You can imagine how much fun this was.
I had experienced these symptoms for over a month and a half before I finally asked a friend who had gone through a similar situation I had this past Summer, if this was normal. She said, “Sounds like you have adrenal fatigue, a very common side effect from trauma and stress.” I Google searched what the heck adrenal fatigue is, and turns out… I had nearly every symptom.
In this article, I am sharing what I personally learned about the disorder and what has helped me restore my health. DISCLAIMER: I am obviously not a medical doctor nor specialist in this field. It’s always best to consult with your medical practitioner before taking any supplements or changing your diet. I DO want to shed light on this disorder and what has been beneficial in my recover for those who may be struggling as well.
“Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be” – Abraham Lincoln.
This year has been a year of reflection. I have consistently challenged myself with different ideals and ways of thinking. One aspect that I have recently been fascinated in, is cultivating happiness. I began with the question, “Are we capable of being happy no matter what the situation may be?”
Coming back to America after traveling around the world, was nothing less than a shock to the system. I learned so much, grew as a person, and changed while I was away. One thing that ignited in my persona is the desire to endlessly explore.
While away, I gained a new found appreciation for New York City. After visiting 7 countries and 12 cities abroad, there is no place like New York. It is the melting pot of so many types of people and cultures. There is so much going on at all times of the day and night. There are a variety of neighborhoods packed with culture and sightseeing. It’s impossible to go hungry with all the delicious food options.
Back in 2016, there was a popular watch company that so many bloggers worked with. They were the “it” brand to collaborate with and I couldn’t wait for my turn! Then, one random week day I received and email from this popular watch brand’s team. They were interested in work with me on Instagram. I was so excited! I read through their briefing, and was kind of taken back by all the requests. It was the most extensive briefing I had received at that point, but I didn’t care because I wanted to work with this company for months now. I followed up the email exchange with the typical, “I am very interested, what is your budget?”.
That’s when things got interesting. It turned out that this “it” watch company isn’t interested in paying bloggers or influencers even when requesting at least 3 very meticulous Instagram post per watch. Guess what happened? I declined the collaboration, and soon enough a majority of other bloggers and influencers stopped working with the brand as well.
It is hard to simply walk down the street without someone holding their phone arms length in front of their face trying to get that perfect selfie. The term, “do it for the ‘gram”, has become an all too familiar phrase. Trying to get “insta famous” or become an “instagram model”, is the new profession for our youths. But what is happening to our mental well being?
Oh, the “cool girl”. We all know that one girl who is capable of pounding back beers, maintains that chill factor, is a size 2 and gorgeous. Well that’s at least how the writers in Hollywood imagine her to be.
You see, the cool girl doesn’t exist. It isn’t a real person but a persona invented primarily by guys who wish they could find a girl like this to date in real life. The effects though, is entirely damaging to women as a whole.
People say that there’s a career for every personality, and you should always choose a calling that represents your inner values and personal traits. A friend recently turned to me and said, ” I don’t think you are tapping into your fullest potential and using all your skill sets”. I was baffled. It had been on my mind lately, different ways I could hone in on my caring nature and my ability to help others. It made think of the different opportunities and careers that are out there for that distinct personality trait. Here are a few that popped up. Keep reading and let me know which one you would choose!
Today is a big topic that affects the majority of the population. Self-sabotage or self sabotaging, is the act of ruining or hurting our chances of obtaining something we long for. It could be a career goal, a relationship, personal health goal, or even the chance of daily happiness.
Often times, we don’t realize we are self sabotaging. The reason being is, it is so instinctive that it has become the norm of living. To demonstrate and explain more, I’ll use my own personal experiences when it comes to self sabotage, because after all, I was once a queen at it.
Thank you Not Jess Fashion for this awesome post about reflecting and the blog tips you enclosed. After reading, I realized holy cow, we are at the half way point. 6 months have past since January 1st when all those feelings of a fresh start and anything is possible was overwhelming. But guess what, anything is still possible! This is a good time to sit down and take inventory of what is happening, what has happened, and where you want to go. Here is how!
“Too often, it’s easy to get stuck in a rut, doing the same thing the same way over and over every day. But if we are going to live at our absolute best, we should constantly be growing and sharpening our skills. We should strive to learn and grow every single day because when you stop learning, you stop growing. When you stop growing, you stop living.
I have been living in New York City for nearly 11 years now, and I think I finally understand the meaning of the phrase, In a New York Minute….”
My last two months have been a whirlwind. Between packing up my entire beloved apartment, to finishing work assignments, my brain sometimes has a hard time comprehending what’s happening. For instance, I’ll be halfway through an email when I start thinking “Did I pack the coffee machine?”. Disoriented is a real thing!